Head in a bubble, now you're in trouble

I've spent the last six weeks in a giant bubble.  Not a "Glenda the Good Witch" kind of bubble, but a kind of bubble void of any oxygen that has floated me here and there and everwhere.  And then ... POP!  The other day, it finally burst and landed me back at home, with no idea of what was going on around me.

I had great intentions for this summer.  I was going to take the kids to the pool.  We would go on walks in the evenings, and E would take swim lessons.  We'd get him a bike with training wheels, and R would learn to ride a tricycle.  There would be lots of grilling out and roasting marshmallows with good friends.

I'd be busy with real estate, but I'd balance work perfectly with my volunteer duties with Ethiopian Orphan Relief.  I'd begin a direct mail campaign and help raise much-needed funds for orphaned and vulnerable children. 

And in the meantime, I'd potty train R before the school year.

But as you can probably guess by the way this post is going, none of this actually happened.  What happened instead was that everyone got sick, and stayed sick for a month (in fact, I am still sick after 5 weeks).  While we were all ailing, lawns needed to be mowed ... errands needed to be run ... and children needed to be fed.  Bathtimes needed to be squeezed into the 15 minutes we had between one thing and another. Tantrums and tears became like background noise, and the exhaustion grew and grew.

A couple of "easy" family trips were made difficult by long car rides, lots of packing, lots of carting toddlers from here to there.  Sicknesses continued.  My grandmother passed away, and more chaos ensued while trying to pack up the kids up quickly, take care of work and change appointments, drive toddlers back out to Washington, DC for the scond time in two weeks, and take care of them at the wakes and funeral.

The bubble finally popped this past Monday, the day after we returned, exhausted, from the funeral.  I asked my husband to take the kids to school, and on my own way to work he called me.  "Um, do they have school today?  There's no one here."  Ohmygoodness.  In all the chaos of the last month, I didn't realize their summer camp had ended ... and that they would start school the next week for good.  The summer was over.  I hadn't been fulfilled my volunteer duties to the best of my ability, and had let people down.  We hadn't gone on family walks, pool trips, or bike rides.  I needed to get a uniform for little R.  And she still wasn't potty trained.

POP.  Back to reality.  Now it's time to mop up the suds ... and catch up on everything that I missed while floating from here to there.  It's been a learning experience, to say the least.  And that's one thing that's made the summer all worth it -- that I've learned, learned, learned.  And I'm still learning.  And I made some precious memories to forever remind me of how blessed I am to have such wonderful teachers.

 

Endings, Beginnings, and Ice Cream

Mom has been in the Sick House for the last month, hence the time gap since my last post. First, E got bronchitis, then my darling husband got the flu (in July??), and now I'm sick as well.  Well, what goes around comes around.  It happens to even the very, very best of us, I suppose. ;)

The real estate market around here continues to be very, very interesting.  Things that are updated and priced well go FAST ... and yet, some other very valuable properties that just might need some cosmetic updating -- but are otherwise gems in very desirable locations -- are sitting longer.  I recently read an article about how, more than ever now, buyers are "community shopping" as opposed to "home shopping."  It surprised me, because I am tending to see the opposite with many buyers (at least around here).  I am seeing many buyers just want "finished and new" -- even if the location might be less convenient or less well established.  Although, every buyer is different ... and it's true, beauty is in the eye of the beholder.

As a newer agent, I'm learning quickly that it's hard to say "goodbye" to my clients at the closing table.  I mean, some people and families I feel I've really gotten to know and love.  I have had the best time helping them realize their dreams in their new home.  It's a highly personal decision I've helped them make,  and one of the biggest financial investments they may make in their lives.  I've talked with them day in and day out, spent hours in the car with them, and have really gotten to know them. 

And then, at the closing table, you hand them the keys and they ride off into the sunset.  Which, of course, I'm HAPPY about -- that's exactly what we've worked towards together for all this time, right? But I am finding that, like some weirdo, I have the sudden urge to shout "Call me!" as they drive away.  But, this is part of the job, and I am getting to learn it!

And with every goodbye, there are more "hellos" around the horizon.  I love meeting new people and working with new clients.  And the cycle continues (or so we hope in this business! ...)

And the last thing I've learned so far from my new career?  Ice cream has to happen.  Every night.  Not sure why -- maybe it's because it's so dang hot out?  Maybe I subliminally think I can depend on it's sweet, cold, creamy goodness at the end of every day?  Maybe I'm overanalyzing my ice cream addiction?  I don't know.  Does anyone else have this problem???

All I know is that as I close the freezer, full and happy, it's as if I hear that faint and familiar voice call out to me ... "Call me!"  Yes, yes I will, Edy's Limited Edition Pineapple Coconut.  Same time tomorrow night.  ;)

Three-Year-Olds' (Chicken) Nuggets of Wisdom

About a week after I began work, my three-and-a-half year old son came up to my while I was getting ready.

"Mommy," he said and sighed.  "I'm so proud of you."

"Aw, thanks, bud.  Why?" I said.

"Because you're working now.  I'm so, so proud of you now, mommy!"

"Ummm, thanks bud."  I said.  But I really thought, "Huh.  Does that mean he was 'ashamed' when I 'wasn't working' taking care of him and his little sister all this time?"  Of course, it was a funny moment I didn't take too seriously.  But he did bring it up again today out of the blue.  "Mommy, I'm so proud of you.  You go to work ... and I'm also proud you got your nails painted."

(Sigh.  Always a critic.)

Actually, he's fascinated by the whole new "working" mom thing.  He loves to pretend he's going to work with my team and pulls out imaginary smart phones and pretends to text and leave work-related voice mail messages to my team members.

And I love that he's always trying to help and support me in this new role.  Every morning, while we're all getting ready, he asks what I'm going to do that day. The other day, I was a little stressed already in the morning.  I had a lot on my plate (both at home and work).  When he asked what I was doing that day, I went through the list.  "Mommy!" he practically yelled.  "You can't do all those things!"  Then he lowered his voice seriously and said:

"You just have to do them one at a time."

"Huh," I thought again.  Here I am, 30 years old, and I haven't figured out what my three-year-old already knows.  People pay big bucks for therapists and coaches to give them the same sound advice. 

Simple, innocent, and honest-to-goodness nuggets of wisdom.  From a three-year-old.

Opening up about open houses

Are you one of those people who loves to go to open houses?  Do you love spending Sunday afternoons wandering around their neighbors' houses to see how they decorate ... to see how much work they put into the home ... and to see how much they're really asking for the house?

If you answered YES to the above questions, don't feel ashamed.  I used to be one of those people too.  As a matter of fact, I have a long-standing relationship with open houses that began long before my real estate career.

Before children, my husband's and my Sunday ritual involved driving around to different open houses.  Sometimes we just followed the signs to see where they took us, and sometimes we got serious and mapped out our routes after scouring the newspaper for open house ads.

When we were first married, we were too dorky scared to leave our real names and contact information at the open houses.  We felt extremely guilty for walking through a house we had absolutely no intention of buying and bothering the poor real estate agent inside.  As time went on, we got slightly less dorky braver and signed in with our real names.

Fast forward -- eight years after going to my first open house, I am a Realtor.  My dad used to always say when I was growing up, "Everything comes full circle."  And now I know it's true because I get people that visit my team's Web site every day looking at homes and leaving fake names/numbers/e-mail addresses.

It doesn't bother me, because I know exactly how they feel.  They don't want anyone to know they were just being nosy and looking at houses.  But I'm here to tell you this:

"Hey!  It's OK!  You're totally not bothering me when you're just coming through looking at houses -- whether it's online or at an open house.  That's what Web sites and open houses are for.  In fact, I WELCOME neighbors and curious people to come on by to my open houses!"

Now, tomorrow I'm holding an open house.  It's not my first; it's actually my third time doing one.  I didn't get much activity at my first two, and I'm hoping that some friends/neighbors/curious people pop on over.  I will have cookies waiting!

The home is in the Brookside Woods neighborhood in Columbus (Worthington schools).  The house is in $89 a square foot, which is just a crazy good deal.

Now, if you want the address, I'll post it on Facebook.  If you're not my FB friend, shoot me a message and I'll give it to you.  (I'm new and slightly cautious about posting about being alone in a house online, because real estate agents are attacked in empty houses more often than I care to think about.  But just so you know, I will have pepper spray on me and my big strong husband close by!)

So if you want to come visit me and check out a fab deal in a fab neighborhood, I'd love to see you tomorrow.  Please don't plan on attacking me.  And please don't be afraid to give me your real name.  :)

Life as we know it

Ahhh, the end of the day.  Before I went back to work, I cherished this time of the day in a "Thank goodness the day is over!" kind of way.  Now, I cherish it because I love the feeling of a day accomplished.

This is not to say that I didn't accomplish anything in the three years I stayed at home.  Of course I did!  I ran a successful (yet messy) household and did everything I could for my two children (who are the loves of my life).  And I still do.  Going back to work doesn't change that.

But being a stay-at-home mom is tough.  I know that stay-at-home moms everywhere will back me up when I say it's one of the hardest, most demanding jobs on earth.  It really is.  And talk about accomplishments: you have wonderful, living, breathing products of all your hard work right there beside you, loving you right back unconditionally.

So why did I decide to start a career in real estate now -- with two young children at home?  Well, answer this is that this was something I dreamed of doing for a long time -- but held back, time and time again, because I never felt it was "the right time."

But guess what?  There may never be "the right time."  It finally dawned on me that "the right time" practically doesn't exist -- that is, unless you make a time "the right time."  There will always be reasons not to do things.  Heck, I find a million reasons every day why now is not the right time to put my folded laundry away.  But I did finally just decided that now is just as good a time as yesterday, next month or next year to start my new career.

And as a result, life as we know it has changed.  All four of us -- hubby, kids, and me -- are learning a new dance, a new routine, and really trying to figure it out along the way. Our house is messier than it was before (could it be possible??  I didn't think it could be.  Turns out I was wrong).  Errands don't get run as quickly or efficiently.  I do miss things like play dates and zoo trips and fun at the pool with my kids during the day.  And I swear my daughter looks older every time I pick her up from her Montessori school every afternoon.

But I'm really excited about my new role as a real estate agent.  There's soooo much to learn, and I'm quickly figuring out that no two days in real estate are the same.  Every client, every house, every aspect of every contact or transaction is different -- and I love that.

I love that I get to help people find the place they can call home.  And I love that, after a great day of helping people, I can go home to my family that I call home.  I feel very fortunate to be in this position, and can't wait to learn more and do more every day -- both at home and at work.  In life.  Period.

"And you may ask yourself ... well, how did I get here?"

That's probably my favorite quote, or at least my favorite quote by the Talking Heads.  :)  In any event, it pretty much sums up my life to this point.

My name is Alex Dedels, and I am a mom to two wonderful children through transracial adoption.  My son, Elias (when he's in trouble, at least; "Eli" the other 80% of the time), was born in Ethiopia.   My daughter, Ryan Ashley, was born in the Buckeye state (a much easier and shorter trip, for sure!).  Both kids are the light of my life, with beautiful eyes and spark-plug personalities.  Just seeing them smile accesses parts of my heart I never knew existed.  I could not have asked for anything more.

And yet, I recently decided to go back to work.  After 3 years as a stay-at-home-mom.

Now, I didn't just decide to go back to work.  I made the decision to completely switch gears and begin a real estate career.  You see, in my previous life (before kids), I was a direct mail writer for non-profits.  I loved the "independent contractor-ness" and the freedom to be creative.  And to market myself.  But, I really didn't love the fact that I didn't work with people.

I had always wanted to go into real estate, from the time I was a little girl and would sit at the breakfast table analyzing real estate publications.  But, the timing was never right ... until I decided that there was no "right time," and that I needed to jump on the ball before I ran out of time.

So, after taking 9.5 hour classes every weekend for 2 months and passing the licensing exam, here I am!  A real estate agent in Ohio.  I am fortunate enough to be a part of a great company (Keller Williams) and a great team (The LaBuda Advantage Team) with more than 20 years experience in the business.  They are teaching me well!  And I'm happier than I've been since college -- and of course, much busier.

I can't wait to have you follow along with me in my journey as a new working real estate mom.  It's sure to be an exciting, terrifying, bumpy, and enjoyable ride.

-Alex  :)